


Useless

by littlemarvelfics



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Pregnancy, Pregnant Reader, Reader-Insert, Reader-Interactive
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-10
Updated: 2019-05-10
Packaged: 2020-02-29 06:31:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,298
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18773161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littlemarvelfics/pseuds/littlemarvelfics
Summary: In which Bucky feels useless and someone helps him out.





	Useless

Bucky laid in bed, staring wide-eyed at the ceiling. You were sound asleep next to him, little snores leaving you every few moments. Bucky glanced over at you, hair thrown everywhere, sleeping in one of his shirts and sighed. He had to get out. Getting out of bed as quietly as possible, he walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table, spotting the black and white picture on the fridge where you had put it up. Clearing his throat, he continued on his mission, making his way to the front door, slipping on shoes and grabbing his keys. Picking up his wallet, he eyed the piece of paper you had brought home earlier that day. He paused for a moment before deciding to take that as well.

Twenty minutes and a few miles later, he pulled into the dusty parking lot of a hole-in-the-wall bar. This is what ordinary people do right? Leave their sleeping wives in the middle of the night to grab a drink? He patted his pocket, checking that the Asgardian liquor Steve had given him was still safely stored away. He walked in and quickly took a seat at the bar, ordering a whiskey. Once it was delivered, he poured a small about of Asgardian liquor into the glass before deciding to toss some more in. Taking a long sip, he grimaced as he pulled out the paper he had brought with him and stared at it. Your neat handwriting addressed the note to him. He missed your doctor’s appointment earlier in the day, not that you minded. You had always been incredibly understanding when it came to his work keeping him away from you. He took a deep breath and tore open the envelope. Pulling out the paper, he read the simple words you had left him.

_“Congratulations Buck, we’re having a baby girl.”_

A girl. Bucky furrowed his brow as he read the words over and over again. A girl. A baby girl that he would be responsible for. A baby girl he had no idea how to take care of. A baby girl he would inevitably let down. He crumpled the paper in his fist, downing the entirety of his drink before signaling for another. He repeated his early movement, pouring his personal liquor into the glass. This time, however, he decided to pour more than his fair share of booze into the whiskey. He didn’t pace himself with this drink, downing it all at once before again asking for another.

He paused before taking his next drink, thinking of you at home. You knew he had a tendency to wander at night, but he always left a note- not this time. This time you would be worried that something happened to him. Your husband. Father of your child. When Buky thought of being a father again, he took another swig of his drink. He was so consumed in his thoughts; he didn’t notice a familiar face sitting next to him.

“Bucky? You good man?” Clint asked.

Bucky turned to face him before speaking.

“Clint? What are you doing here,” he slurred, the Asgardian liquor finding its way into his bloodstream.

“I’m having a quick drink before I get back to Laura and the kids. Are you okay? You’re not looking so good.”

“She’s pregnant,” Bucky stated simply.

“Y/N? Yeah, you told us. Is she okay?”

“She’s great. She’s over the fucking moon.”

“You’re not though huh?”

“Why the hell did she marry me? The girl has no sense,” Bucky grumbled.

“Hey,” Clint cautioned. “She’s your wife and my friend. Watch yourself.”

“I know. I love her. I love her more than anything. It’s just…”

“Yeah?” Clint pressed.

“I’ve seen you with your kids Clint. How did you know?”

“Know what?”

“That you would be such an incredible dad.”

“I didn’t,” Clint said, taking a swig from the beer bottle in front of him. “I grew into it. Like anyone does. You make mistakes, you fix the mistakes. You count your lucky stars you have the girl you do to be your partner in this.”

Bucky gulped down some Asgardian liquor straight from the bottle, shaking his head.

“Maybe I should just leave. They would all be better off. Y/N, the baby. Better off without me.”

“I know your upset Bucky. But don’t you dare walk out on her. I don’t care about the Winter Solider. I’ll still kick your ass,” Clint said firmly.

“Why?! She’s better off without me! I’m a fucked up man with a metal arm! What baby is gonna want that?!” Bucky sobbed.

“Okay, Buck. Let’s get you some air,” Clint replied, getting off his bar stool.

Bucky nodded and stumbled as he stood up, still gripping the note you had written for him.

Clint dragged him out of the bar, into the cold night air hoping to sober him up slightly.

“I’m useless,” Bucky mumbled as he leaned against the wall. “I’m useless. To her. To the baby. I’m useless.”

“Bucky, you’re a lot of things. Useless ain’t one of ‘em.”

“It’s a girl Clint. I’m gonna have a daughter,” he said, thrusting the paper at Clint. “What the hell am I gonna do with a daughter? I don’t know how to be a dad. I’m gonna ruin this kid.”

“You’ve gotta take a breath here. Every time Laura has told me she’s pregnant, I have the same thoughts. I’m not gonna lie to you. Being a parent isn’t easy. Especially when you do what we do for a living. But it’s worth it. The first time they smile at you? Or laugh at you? The first time you get them to stop crying by just holding them– it makes it all worth it. All of the doubt and second-guessing is worth it the first time you get to hold your baby, Barnes.”

Bucky nodded, taking it all in.

“I’ve seen you with my kids Bucky,” Clint continued. “They’re always ecstatic to see you and Aunt Y/N. There’s only one thing that matters here. Are you gonna love this kid and do everything you can to take care of them?”

“Yeah,” Bucky said hoarsely. “Yeah, I am.”

“Then you’ll figure the rest out. It’s gonna be okay Barnes. You’ve got Y/N on your team. Hell, the whole team is on your side. We’re gonna help you and spoil that kid rotten.”

Bucky chuckled and nodded.

“Can I get ya back home to your wife, Buck? She’s gonna worry if you aren’t there.”

“Yeah, thanks, man.”

The ride back to Bucky’s place was silent except the old country song coming from the speakers of Clint’s car. The drive was short, Clint pulled into the driveway in no time, wishing Bucky a goodnight and reassuring him one last time. Bucky responded with a nod of his head.

As soon as Bucky entered the house, he heard your voice before he saw you.

“Steve, he didn’t leave a note. He’s been so weird lately, what if he left?” you sniffled out.

Bucky cleared his throat as he entered the kitchen where you were sitting at the table, wearing Bucky’s shirt and a pair of shorts.   
You let out a sigh of relief.

“He’s here Steve. Sorry, I woke you,” you said quickly before laughing at whatever Steve said and hanging up.

“Steve says you’re a moron and I’m inclined to agree. I get that you need to go out and clear your head why didn’t you leave a note or–”

You were cut off when Bucky pulled you into a bone-crushing hug.

“We’re having a baby, Y/N. A baby girl,” he whispered into your hair.

Any anger you felt before instantly washed away.

“Yeah,” you said, hugging him back. “Yeah, we are.” 


End file.
